In October, 2012 at the ripe age of 32, I was diagnosed with Primary Mediastinal B Cell Lymphoma, a rare and aggressive form of Non-Hodgkin’s Lymphoma. I started this blog about two months after my last cycle of chemotherapy. You may wonder why I didn’t blog during treatment and my reason is simple. I was largely incoherent during that time. As my body and my world crumbled around me, the last thing I thought about was writing a blog. So why blog now? Because now that I am through one of the toughest parts of this battle, I have the rest of my to relive the nightmare. I am ready now to let this story go and give it away to the universe because quite frankly, I don’t want it anymore.
I started this blog post-treatment purely for my own personal therapeutic reasons and as such, my posts are real, raw, and emotional. They are memories, stories, visions, and feelings and they may not be in chronological order or factually correct. There were a handful of beautiful things about this journey but I’m not going to paint a rosy picture for the sake of convincing you that I faced this illness with courage and composure. This was an ugly time.
This is the retelling my story and it’s not perfect. Don’t judge me if my spelling and grammar are incorrect. I do use profanity occasionally. Please don’t be offended. It’s just that sometimes there is no better way to convey an emotion.
In an effort to protect my family and friends and to keep them anonymous, I will not use their names but I will name them in other ways. For example, I will refer to my husband as DH which is short for “Darling Husband.” Although my husband is darling, I would have chosen something different; however, this common abbreviation is everywhere online and so most readers should easily recognize it. I will refer to our amazing two-year old son as Little Man. I have two older siblings, a sister and a brother and I will refer to them simply as Sister and Brother. I’m also blessed to have two brothers-in-law and three sisters-in-law. I think of them as my brothers and sisters too and so to simplify things I will refer to them as Brother2 and Sister2.
Check out my other blog, The Curated Vegan.
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18 months post-treatment